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Putting the Fun in Infundibulum

You, yes you, have an infundibulum in you. Yes, right now. And it's in your brain.

     Why is it there and what is it doing? Well, it is simply connecting the hypothalamus with the posterior lobe of the pituitary gland. This is where the hormone oxytocin* is released to do its dirty work. The infundibulum is also called the pituitary stalk, the infundibular stalk, and the hypothalamohypophyseal tract. Why it needs four names is beyond me and somewhat suspicious.
     Why am I bringing up this information? I encourage you to use it in conversation, just to be weird. Next time you are out with a friend at an eatery say," man, my infundibulum really hurts. Ow. Don't you hate it when that happens?" Maybe say "the doctor said my infundibulum is okay. You gets yours checked, right? Oh man, you need to ask 'em to check it. Say you want the Hypothalamohypophyseal Test."
     Infundibulum is also Latin for funnel. Try using the word when cooking in the kitchen. "Honey, could you pass me the infundibulum? It's in the drawer." Put it on the shopping list when they go to the store. If they actually bring back a funnel, reward them with a treat ( a foot rub, piece of chocolate, 5 minutes of silence ) for putting up with you.


* Oxytocin plays a part in female reproduction stuff, however recent studies have shown its effect on certain behaviors such as orgasm, social recognition, pair bonding, and anxiety. Seems to me that some of what makes humanity screwed up is partly due to this indecisive hormone. **

** Oh, it deals with " feelings of contentment, reductions in anxiety, and feelings of calmness and security " when around your loved one. There have been studies that have shown a link of oxytocin with "human bonding, increases in trust, and decreases in fear," and adult romantic attachment. So if your going out on a date and want to make an amazing impression, be sure to inject some oxytocin into their bloodstream.


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Eldon Litchfield

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